Thursday, 12 April 2012

Shake Me. I Rattle.

That should be the name of my book!  PATTEN PENDING. STEAL AND I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN. Knacker!
'...You need to have a sit down with your EGO!' Blaring 'The Saturdays' through the house.
I'm so gangster....
I had about three hours of sleep last night. I've gone from no medication to....
-Humira
-Iron Tablets
-Calcium Tablets
-Acid Reflux Medication
-Microlite (Not Crohn's but sure, we'll throw it in there!)
-Imodium
-Solpadine (Granted, a regular!)
-Steroid Cream

I've lost my train of thought.
Yes!
So, I was thinking about me aul blog, and thought about how much I missed spreading the joy!
Decided to update/change the style/direction of the entire yoke!
Now- before I launch into my recent hospital appointment (stick around, it gets graphic! In a sexy way! ....no, I'm lying... not in a sexy way...whats wrong with you....), I want to state FOR THE RECORD that I fully support the whole no medication, elemental diet! It didn't work for me, how and ever, it works for a lot of people! I don't know how factual this is, but as it was spoken by my doctor, I like to think she might have picked up a few tricks of the trade in college ''The elemental diet usually works for those who have crohn's in the small bowel-'. So if that is you, then Jesus try it. Okay so that's were I stand with that, moving on.

To continue that statement, my doctor went on to say: ' The elemental diet usually works for those who have crohn's in the small bowel....but you have it there TOO, so maybe it will work'.
I wish I had honed in on this passing remark. Too. Hmmmm. It just recently came back to me & luckily I had scheduled a walk in appointment (No you can't schedule a walk in appointment...I may lie about appointments to receptionists. For FUCK SAKE I'm ill!!!!!) , so with my hospital appointment scheduled
 (I use that term loosely), I brought it up with the most recent cast outs of medical school, a lovely chap though. I've never met the actual head of the department. Lie- I met one man before who used to run it. He made fun of my college course. I willed him to lose the rest of his hair.
ANYWAY- I asked yon doc, 'Where do I have my Crohn's?'
I know I'm an idiot. I knew I had it in my bowels. Somewhere! But I was 10 when I was diagnosed and never got around to asking.
Yon Doc, after riffling through his papers: 'You have a small part in your lower small bowel...- (sigh of relief), you have it right throughout your large bowel, in your stomach, external Crohn's disease And you have an inflamed oesophagus- but we don't think that's Crohn's *smiles*'.
He could add incontinence to the list after hearing that rant.
A rookie mistake on my part then. I should have known the extent of my Crohn's before undertaking something so drastic. Well lesson learnt, BELIEVE ME.

No, my fellow Irish, not to mention my UK & US readers (I've got 'em! :D Seriously! I checked my stats!), I've not been well.
I can't eat anything without it running through me, I've joint pain, mouth ulcers, not to mention my nails completely suck now. So with all this going on... I decided to enter the Miss Louth competition.
Seriously, I mean I'm feeling so great about myself, WHY WOULDN'T I DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS. Sleep deprivation and reruns of 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians' will do crazy things to a girl.
Khloe Kardashian. My Hero.
So I've taken one injection of Humira so far. I've also missed a lot of college. The stress of that is horrendous. I've been putting off dealing with that by watching episodes of 'Made in Chelsea'.
I was given a choice however. Steroids or Humira.
Ugh. Steroids.
I wouldn't say I'm the vainest person I know, it's just that whole moon face look was completely 2005.
I've done it twice and after looking back at photos of my bright balloon mug looking back at me, I wanted to seep into a vat of depression. Dramatic, but sure, I'm tired.
My bones are so incredibly skinny already that I'm scared of being shredded down even further.
Currently a UK size 6. I have a Miss Louth dress fitting later.
What shade goes well with bone...?

Sarah C

2 comments:

  1. Hey dude,

    I'm all for striving to be her but.. why is Beyonce labelled at the bottom? Hahahaha!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The question should be, why isn't she labelled in everyone!

    ReplyDelete